Friday, March 07, 2008


Is ANYONE Surprised By the “Hillary Monster” Story?

For months now, in chat rooms, e-mails, in small towns and in big cities, Obama supporters have been raving about Hillary Clinton. While Barack himself has been “above the fray” and serenading us about our Declaration of Independence, and Abraham Lincoln, his backers rip into Hillary.

And now, Obama advisor Susan Power tells a reporter that Hillary is a “monster” who will stoop to anything.

I’m glad this is finally out there in the open. Because it shows the similarities between Republicans and the Obama campaign, in their approach to Hillary Clinton. In fact, if you Google, Hillary Monster, after you scroll past the news results, you’ll get a series of alternating sites, between Obama supporters and conservatives, demonizing the Senator from New York. All we need now is for Barbara Bush to weigh in again with the “B-word”.

Here’s the Obama rationale. Any challenge Senator Clinton puts forward about Senator Obama: his resume, any flaw in his logic, any difference of opinion, any questions about his background, these are all “negative” or “dirty” politics.

The best recent example is the “3 AM phone call” commercial, that the Clinton campaign ran in Texas, Ohio, and several other states. The ad suggests that when the phone rings at three in the morning with a message about a terrorist or other enemy to America, Hillary’s experience makes her the one you want answering the phone.

In addition, out on the campaign trail, Ms. Clinton committed the heinous sin of saying that both she and Republican John McCain have far more experience than Senator Obama.

I can’t tell you how many obscenities Senator Clinton has inspired in the Obama camp with these messages.

It’s interesting, because months ago, I posted Senator Obama’s response to my open letter to all Democrats, asking them to stop bickering amongst themselves. His reply was that it was important to point out differences between them.

There’s nothing “dirty” about saying “I’m the one you want answering that phone.” And there’s nothing dirty about saying, “John McCain and I each have more experience.” Because the issue is going to be discussed, and better now than later.

Unless you’d rather discuss it in December, when someone says, “Yeah I voted for McCain instead of Obama. I just felt that McCain has more experience.”

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Please tell me this isn’t happening.

Democrats in Florida and Michigan decided to move up their Presidential primaries to earlier dates in the calendar, like about 20 other states this year. The Democratic National Committee said, “if you do that, we won’t count your delegates.”

I know what you’re thinking. “But hold on—they’re ALL Democrats. SURELY, they can work out a compromise.”

They didn’t.

So the states held the primaries anyway, with the knowledge that the votes wouldn’t count.

Nobody campaigned. In Michigan, most of the candidates didn’t even appear on the ballot.

Hillary Clinton got the most votes in each primary. So, of course, people from her campaign tried to make the case that the party should count the votes and award the states their delegates, a total of 367 new delegates.

There’s no way it was going to happen, but they had to try.

There’s been talk of a revote, a “do-over,” but that’s not going to happen. Because a “do-over” would cost 37 million dollars, and the Democratic Party would have to spend it, instead of using the money in the general election against John McCain.

Okay, so don’t count those primary votes.

Fine. But there’s one problem. However you do the math, the Democrats will want to win Michigan and Florida in November. It certainly helps their chances if the rank and file members of the Democratic party, and the voters of those states, get to have their say in the nominating process.

To have a convention without delegates from Michigan and Florida, states with a total of 44 electoral votes, just about a sixth of the 270 you need to win, would be a terrible strategic move.

Someone better figure out something.

But for now, two quotes come to mind. The first one is an old joke. “President Nixon is a corrupt, vicious warmonger. If he were running against anyone but the Democrats, he’d have no chance at all.”
The second one goes back to comedy great Will Rogers. “I am not a member of any organized party — I am a Democrat.”

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Thursday, February 28, 2008

Barack is the BOmb!!!

Hi there, Obama fans!

So nice to see so many of you here!

Just a few messages before you go back to your chat rooms.

Just for the teens and twenty somethings, hey, we’re all really flattered that you’ve decided to pay attention to what’s going on outside your laptop. What a relief that politics are cool! Please enjoy the whole ride. If for some reason, you don’t lock up the nomination, thanks for visiting the Democratic Party!

If, as expected Barack (Oooh! He’s so dreeeeamy!) captures the nomination, don’t forget to take a moment to stop calling Hillary every #@$!%-ed up name you can think of. First off, you really have no idea who she is! Just that she’s not Barack!! And second, guess whose help you’re gonna need to win the general campaign? No, not Lily Allen…nope, Hillary supporters! How f-ed up is that! OMG!!

Also, kids, if you do win the general election (fingers crossed!), thanks for visiting the political arena. Drive home safely. Now that you’ve elected a cool President, you can go back to ignoring matters that might involve conflict, and avoiding or ignoring people who disagree with you. ‘Cause they’re sooo negative!

If you’re a Governor of a State, or a Senator or Representative, who decided to go with Obama because your daughter or son told you to, that is just so sweet I don’t know where to begin. Thanks!

Listen, while we have a moment, could you give us your child’s opinion on health care, our relationship with China, our fiscal policy, how to deal with the two Koreas, how to extricate ourselves from Iraq and do the least possible damage, and a short list of Supreme Court nominees? Thanks! And good luck on that Trig quiz! Those are tough.

And finally, if you’re one of those supercool folks who’s joined the Obama campaign, because all of us are going to come together and solve all our problems, could you tell me, when we unite together, including people who didn’t vote for Obama (right…losers!), what are we going to do together?

Since it’s not about race, and it’s not about age, and it’s not about red states and blue states, and it's not about Barack, who is it about? And when he says, “Our time has come,” whose time is it?

That’d be awesome to know. Also, just for my own information—I hate missing the big news stories—when did the Republican Party announce their surrender?

Anyway, no worries. I’m sure everything’ll be just fine from now on.

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